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Vinolia Sim
Chayemba
16.09.1991
TK&SD Sutomo 1
FMSS 1b 2d 3f 4f
SP Biomedical Science




*high voltage content
*craziness
*EMO alert!
*no empty stomach
*parental guidance
*flooding of feelings


Bituwin - template
Dementee - image


If you think you can, you can!

Saturday, February 16, 2008

where should i really go now?
what am i going todo with my life?

poly?
JC?

come to think of it it is really scary that i am left with less than 1 week, to be exact 5 days to enjoy myself before suffering the JC life. Time flows and float away so fast. I just spent the last 1 whole month doing practically nothing, execpt going out, have fun, rotting, partying, splurging on unknown stuffs,running and doing all sorts of thing. EVERYTHING but studying and playing piano.
It is really scary to think that 1 month has actually pass and i didnt even achieve anything in that period of time.
I regretted for not practicing piano regularly and worse i havent even bought the piano exam skills book which i was supposed to buy 2 weeks ago and practiced at least 80percent of the syllabus. COme to think of it, I dissapointed my teacher so much.. I felt regretful, but what can i do now? practically NOTHING coz i am going to see her in merely 2 days time..

Now, come to the choice that i have to make between poly and jc.
90percent i would get into CJC if i would to wait for the JAE posting result to come out. With the l1r5 of 12 i should be able to get into CJC easily and i had even put 1st choice.
but now, i am being doubtful of whether should i or should i not go to jc and spend the rest of my 2 years there.

the reasons are:
-JC life is damn freaking stressful (more white hair by the end of 2years)
-
the subs that we are going to study is not really relavant to what we are going to do in our life (since i want to take a forensic course next time)
-JC requires us to wear uniform to school and proper attire such as 70% white colour shoes, neatly pinned fringe (i would have to start pinning my hair which sucks like hell)
-studying in JC is very time consuming (not to include our CCAs)
-Need to wake up very early (even though cjc is just 1 stp away frm my house,i still dont like the idea of having to wake up like 6 in the morning everyday and go to school compared to those poly people who have a more flexible timetable which doesnt require one to wake up 6 in the morning)
-lesser cute guys? (can this even be considered as a reason?)

FATALITY TEEHEEE>...............

thus studying in poly will give us a more hands on project and research about our real life and so on... flexible schedule, lesser hectic life, earn money coz u can work...
HOWEVER....
-I am not sure on the course that i am going to take if i were to go poly, OKay, most probably i will be going to SP becoz the courses there are generaally better compared to other polys.
But i am nt sure whether BIOMED is the right course for me even though they offer histological techniques in which they will teach you about helping a forensic surger in cutting off the dead body and so on -->very useful to my carreer nxt time.

-What if i change my mind about what i want to do next time, maybe i am no longer interested in forensic? or lifesciences? will the 3 years of poly education be a waste?
yes it will definetly be (",)



Dear Lord, I would like to pray for guidance in choosing the course that i want to take, it can be JC or even POLY, I will choose whichever course that God has decide upon for i know that U have made this decision for a PURPOSE, which is to prosper me and not to harm me.. for my own future and my best interestss.. So GOd, please tell me what todo and guide me through this crisis.
Thank you for your abundant love Lord

In Jesus name i pray,

amen

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SO CLOSE

Your're in my arms
And all the world is so calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when i m with you
So close to feeling alive


A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So i beat mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever i know
All that i wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing that this was not pretend
And now you're beside me and look how far we've come
So far we are so close

How could i face the faceless days
If i should lose you now?
We are so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believeing that this was not pretend
Let's go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far.......

Friday, February 15, 2008

14th february..
it is supposed to be VAlentine's day today...
FARAH's bday is also today...
2nd last day i got to spend with my lover, Joanna.

the food at the carousel ROyal plazA was very very nice.the food ranges from cakes, to seafood, to oriental food to dessert and strawbery fondue.. it was only a 2 hour high tea buffet thou.
so the most important thing for a buffet restaurant is the Quality, not the Quantity.
ok now i would like to wish happy bday to farah
HAPPY BDAY TO U
HAPPY BDAY TO U
HAPPY BDAY TO FARAH
HAPPY BDAY TO U..........

since my bf is in indonesia, i cant spend my Vday with him already. sad sad. but what can i do?lol. anw spend the night rotting at border for 2 hours after farah and nina left about 9. we stayed till 11pm when a guy who had sat near us approached us and suddenly talked to us(actually i had been sensing that he kept looking at our direction.mmm maybe mine? lol)
the question he asked was :
what will ladies do if they are attracted to a man?
wad kind of weird question is he asking us during valentine day?

now i dont feel like writing anymore.. lol. so we will continue the discussion of the convo of that random man.
TEEHEEEE...............
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Tuesday, February 12, 2008

blogging is the same as writing a diary but the later need the use of pen and paper which is not needed in blogging. for some reason, i always associate blogging with emoing.i guess i have gotten this idea from samuel aka samipotato aka muel aka my darling...
his blog is full of emo stuff starting from ranting about his love life, gay life, normal life, dreams and aspirations..
read it and prove it to urself =)
http://www.iamslay.blogspot.com

i would only blog when i feel emotional, sentimental, sad, lost, depressed.... the feeling that is inside me couldnt be written into words no matter how hard i try to pour out all my feelings into it.
it is just something inside me that doesnt allow me to pour out all my feeling and maybe i am the type of person who would prefer to keep certain stuff to herself.
something weird perhaps.
now i will tell myself to blog whenever i feel like i have nobody to talk to, whether is it happy or sad feeling that is piling up inside me..

coz i believe that there is God will always hear me out and be with me not only in times of crisis but also every single moment of my life here, amen...


life changing dream

listen to me will ya
oh my dear friend
listen to me will ya not
oh my dear friendl

i stared at my own reflection
the once happy and cheerful me
is yet to be found deep beneath my soul
carved with thick layers of blood

i was left all alone
here in the dark corner of my room
who will even care about that
as they have forgotten about their fellow friend

i spend the night
being left alone
being forgotten
being left aside

who will care for me?
i will not give up
for i believe that
it is just a dream

a dream that is not real for once
a dream that will bring back my old cheerful self
a dream that will rejuvenate my life
a dream that will not leave me alone in the end

listen to me will ya
oh my dear friend
just listen.. will you not
to my life changing dream...

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that feeling is burning inside me now..
it was so sudden and i would never think this will happen..
the excitment, the only one which keeps me going on living here..
i dont know why did this even happen..

i really want to keep my hopes up high..
but i know i shouldnt expect much from that person..
but if should i give up now..
that thing that i ve been 'dreaming' of will never come..


despite of all these..
i still hope that we will get to know each other more..

we started to talk. "hi" i dont think that is even considered as talking. erm we said hi to each other around 1 week ago when we passed each other in the lift.
today we talked again. i asked her whether she wanted to use it and she actually let me used it 1st not knowing that i was about to Shit at that time. ohwell
luckily i didnt take very long to pass that motion.
okay.. so thats all our tiny convo for these 3 weeks of me staying here.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

to my soulmate..
i am dedicating this to this special soulmate...

thank you so much for ur presence,
now i understand the meaning of soulmate,
thanks for ur pieces of advice,
thanks for ur brotherly and sisterly love,
thanks for ur time,
thanks for ur help all these whille (willing or not willing),
thanks for ur accompaniment all these while,
thanks for making me ur good friend,

you make me feel safe
you make me feel happy
you make me feel hopeful
you make me the way i am
you make me realise what is a soulmate
though you might not realise it,
but u have become one good soulmate
and i hope we will stay as good friend as ever..

actually i found this cute card about soulmate and valentine. then i thought of giving it to u, shld i? haha

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Friday, February 01, 2008

what am i going todo in my life?
that is something i have to ponder..
many people said i get a good result.,12 pointer
yes compared to some other people out there... but when compared to my own friends, my own classmates, my own school friends, i am actually the bottom fews.
let me share what are my school standard this year :
3 pp who got 9 distictions
16 pp who got 8 distinctions
20 pp who got 7 distinctions
that is all i need to show.i dont even need to count those who gto 6 distinctions. and look at me, 3 distinctions. what is there to compare with the rest of my schoolmates?


jc students taking A level?
poly students getting a diploma degree?
forensic scientist?
business woman?
biomedical resercher?
musician?

okay. for now i like forensics. but there i dont have any chances of studying what i like.
simply because:
we have insufficient income to support my education in australia
there isnt any forensic courses here in singapore.

Although i would still like to put up my hopes for education in australia, but i know i need God's miracle for this to happen. i keep praying, believing that that day will come..


i love singing... do i have the talent? i have yet to find out.. sometimes i think i have, but on the other times i feel like i am just a sore loser who doesnt even have the skill to sing and yet still dare to dream that one day i will become a famous singer or actress.

i like to improvise music and play pop music, but i wasnt thought during my piano lessons.
if i want, i will have to pay an extra 320 to go for the special course in musicianship and my parents didnt allow me to go for the course.. i felt that my music life just stopped revolving the moment my mum said NO.

now i seem to have no idea what todo with my life besides going to jc and study those useless subjects for the next two years, but what todo..
i dont have any other choices, do i?
now money seems to be the roots of my problems.
will it shatter my dream?

to many people, i am a very happy and rich young lady who always get what she wants.
now if people were to read this post, will they still have the same mindset of me?

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